From: sev
Date: 4/14/98
Time: 12:24:23 PM
Remote Name: 204.177.154.236
Adding another to an existing couple?
It can be hard. There's so many couples out there looking for a bisexual female, and many bisexual women have become wary of them, because so many of them are only looking for a cheap fantasy.
Adding another person to an existing relationship is a lot like finding somebody new in general. Go where single people who will be interested are -- in this case, network with other poly people. My poly page has a link to the alt.polyamory home page, which includes resources on how to network.
Once you've found a group to network with, do NOT go immediately on the prowl. Get to know the group, interact, make friends. Let people know, gently and politely, that you're looking for a third, and leave it at that. If there's a potential lover there, let HER approach you two, not the other way around. Let your actions speak for you -- be a good member of the community, don't push, and the right person should eventually come by.
It takes a lot of patience to prove you're not just another clueless couple looking for a sex toy.
sev